Skogen's Birth Story

Yesterday I was a guest speaker in the first year medical school class. I was there to talk about my births! It was fun remembering back to Maida's birth and exciting for me to tell about Skogen's birth too. I wrote Skogen's birth story down a few weeks ago, but never posted it on the blog. I thought that after digging it up for yesterday, I should post it here for all of you too. Enjoy (it's rather long-!)...

After nine months of researching repeat C-sections and VBACs (vaginal birth after Cesarean), choosing to have a repeat C-section was never something I considered, especially with the dream of someday being able to deliver naturally. The research always favored a vaginal delivery over a repeat C-section, but gave specific warnings about breech babies, diabetic mothers, big babies, and other situations where a vaginal delivery wouldn't be recommended after a prior C-section. At my 38 week appointment, my family doctor, Dr. Whitworth, expressed her concerns of our baby boy being a bit bigger than our first baby (who got stuck during delivery and after trying the vacuum suction, was delivered by an emergency C-section) and also that he wasn't engaging into my pelvis. We had an ultrasound a couple days later to determine approximate weight and within a few hours of the ultrasound I was on the phone with an obstetrician scheduling a C-section, as our baby was predicted to be over eight pounds. A week later, on January 14th, our scheduled C-section brought us our second child, weighing in at 9 pounds 5.6 ounces! I was initially a bit hesitant about writing my birth story since I was so disappointed that it was another C-section and I didn't feel that my birth story was actually a birth story at all! With the encouragement of Erik and others who have written me requesting all the details, I finally decided to sit down and write about it…

My day started at 7:00 Wednesday morning, after which time I could not have anything to eat or drink until after the scheduled 3:00pm surgery. Being a big breakfast eater, plus being pregnant, it was really hard to do. I actually forgot that I wasn't supposed to eat after 7:00 and when 8:00 rolled around, I hadn't eaten breakfast yet and I was STARVING! Against doctor's orders, I decided to go ahead and eat a few pieces of toast and drink a small glass of juice! There was no way that I would have made it all day without eating!

Erik went to school in the morning and I made last minute preparations at home for Maida, our 20-month-old who would be staying with my parents while we were gone. Erik picked me up at a 10 minutes 'til noon and we took off for the hospital. It was a bit surreal that we were going to have a baby that day - no labor, no water breaking, no speeding to the hospital - and really, it felt no different than any other day. I told Erik that it felt more like we were going to check into a hotel than have baby. We walked into the hospital, carrying our bags, and we were checked into our room at the front desk - making it feel even more like checking into a hotel.

We organized our things and I changed into a hospital gown. I kept reorganizing my things in the room, putting off getting into the hospital bed as long as I could. I just couldn't believe that I was going to let them slice open my body, reorganize my internal organs, and then have to lay in bed for a few weeks before getting even half-way back to feeling normal. It didn't seem like the ideal way to have a baby. My disappointment in having to have another C-section was so great, I could not even think about the baby at that point. I was dreading the needles and most of all, scared to be laying there awake while they sliced away, but knew that actually being present for the birth of this child was important to me after being asleep when Maida was born.

The first thing the nurse did was start an IV with some saline solution. Then I got some blood drawn and there we sat, waiting for an operating room to open up. Our OB, Dr. Boyle, had an emergency come up since she was on call, so we had even more time to wait. As we waited, we sent emails to friends and family to let them know that Skogen was coming, we talked about how different this day was compared to the birth of our daughter, and we talked about whether or not we were making the right decision. I told Erik that if the baby turned out to be less than eight pounds, I was going to request that they take the baby and put him back inside me and then let me try to deliver vaginally. Of course I was kidding, but I wished that I wasn't. Erik told me that I could change my mind and that we didn't have to go through the surgery, but after all the work it was to get this C-section scheduled on Skogen Sprang's birthday (the famous skier we named Skogen after) I didn't feel like we could change our minds. Even with the nagging thoughts of whether or not this was the right decision and the disappointment in myself that I felt, I knew it'd be okay in the end. During this time of discussion about my disappointment, something amazing happened.

The contractions started about an hour before the surgery. At first I couldn't believe what was happening. As the contractions started getting more and more intense, and within a few minutes of each other, I mentioned to Erik that I was having contractions, and then to the nurse who suggested that we check my cervix. Not liking pelvic exams, and knowing that I'd probably have to have a C-section anyway, I decided just to ride out the contractions until we got to the operating room. We thought about asking for a monitor to see how intense they really were, but when we were going to ask the nurse, it was time to go. These contractions were very significant to me and such a blessing, as according to the research I did, the contractions before a baby is born (even before a C-section) are very healthy for the baby, preparing him for life outside the womb. The ideal C-section for me would have been waiting until I went into labor and then going in for a C-section, as opposed to scheduling a C-section… which is what it felt like was happening! However, the doctors don't like to live on the edge more than they have to and didn't want me VBACing what could have been a 10 pound baby! To have my contractions start right before my scheduled C-section was such a "God-thing" and assured me that we were doing this C-section at the right time and in the right place.

At just after 3:00pm they came and got us for pre-op and after Erik changed into a jumpsuit-looking outfit, we were off to the operating room. The nurses that greeted me as they wheeled me into the OR were great! They really made me feel comfortable, despite the bright lights and freezing cold temperature of the room. This experience was so different than being urgently whisked into the OR for the emergency C-section with Maida. This time around, nobody was screaming or scrambling. Everyone was smiling and I wasn't in excruciating pain! I was first introduced to the nurse anesthetist and the anesthesiologist. They assisted the nurses in replacing my leaky IV and then they started preparing me for the spinal. I was moved onto the operating table and a hairnet was placed on my head. I sat up as they washed my back three times with some cold iodine and then they placed a piece of plastic on my back. Erik was able to stay with me during the surgery prep, mostly because he's a medical student, and also because the anesthesiologist was pretty laid back. Up until the needle went in, the contractions were coming closer together and becoming more intense, however I was able to just close my eyes and breathe through them for comfort. As I sat there on the operating table, I grabbed my hardening stomach during a contraction and I remember just staring down at this little (well, big) bump that I had grown to love. I realized at this point that I wasn't only saying goodbye to any chance I had of a vaginal delivery, but I was saying goodbye to my pregnancy. No more little kicks and punches… no more having to run to the bathroom in the middle of the night… no more smiles from total strangers as they stared at my belly… I believe that this is a very bitter-sweet moment for a mother, especially a mother of a scheduled birth, because she doesn't have any of the natural "get this baby out of me" hormones.

As the needle went into my back, what felt like electric shocks went down my legs, and then I started to get numb. I really enjoyed the numbness, not only because I had been so uncomfortable carrying a big baby around for nine months, but also because the contractions were becoming more and more intense as time went on and this relieved me of the pain and the pressure. I was expecting the numbness to feel like when you go to the dentist and get your mouth numb, but this was even better! This felt like I was sitting in a hot tub. I wasn't even bothered at all by not being able to move my legs. After I was numb they inserted the Foley catheter (which I didn't feel either) and started some Pitocin into my IV.

Dr. Whitworth, our family doctor, came to be there for Skogen and it was comforting to have her there for me too, as a friend if not a doctor. Dr. Boyle, along with a family medicine resident, Dr. Eichten, arrived shortly after. The resident was the husband of a girl that I was in prenatal yoga with, who Erik and I got to meet earlier this year. It was fun to see him again and have him be apart of our birth story. (He had just delivered his own son a couple weeks before!) My arms were strapped down to each side of me and oxygen was placed on my nose. The nurse anesthetist told me to tell her if I felt nauseated at any time during the surgery so that they could give me something for it. While the doctors were scrubbing in, I suddenly felt like puking, so I told the nurse and she gave me something through my IV. She said that I was feeling nauseous because my blood pressure was low. This happened two or three other times during the operation, but it didn't bother me too much because the medication she gave me to relieve the nauseous feeling worked very quickly. I hate throwing up and not having to throw up while giving birth to Skogen was a blessing. I remember puking everywhere while trying to push Maida out, which was a horrible feeling!

The only thing I felt during the surgery was pulling and tugging, but nothing painful at all. It actually felt like they were just massaging my belly! Erik stood up and watched the whole thing, even snapped a few pictures! Skogen was out just minutes after cutting my belly open and he came out crying! They lowered the sheet separating my head from the sterile field so that I could see him right away. It was amazing to see my baby like that- still a little bloody and covered with white stuff from being inside. To see my baby this way has always been a dream of mine; holding my new baby on my chest immediately after birth has been another dream of mine, but this wasn't possible because my arms were strapped down to each side of me. I know that I definitely didn't have the same hormone-rush that I hear mothers have after vaginal deliveries, but I did feel a special bond with Skogen immediately and wanted to hold and love him right away. Maybe the Pitocin that I was receiving through the IV to help my uterus contract after the surgery was responsible for the warm-fuzzies that I felt at this point... I believe, though, that God had something to do with this too.

They took Skogen over to a warmer where Dr. Whitworth examined him and made sure that everything was okay. His APGAR scores were both 9's, pretty much the best a baby can get! Everyone kept remarking on how big he was and how strong his lungs were! After they got Skogen wrapped up, they brought him over to me and unstrapped one of my arms so that I could touch him and kiss his face. The instant he heard my voice he stopped crying. You could tell that he recognized my voice. AMAZING. I was even more in love with him now than I had been five minutes before. A few minutes later they took him up to the nursery to warm him, bathe him, and get him ready for me to come up from recovery. Erik was able to go with him and help with all of that. The rest of the surgery was actually relaxing! I laid there while they finished up and I even dozed off a few times with the encouragement of the nurse anesthetist who was so helpful in making me feel proud and happy about this delivery. As they were just finishing up, the nursery called with Skogen's weight and height. All the nurses cheered when they announced 9 pounds 5.6 ounces in the OR. They all knew that if he wasn't a big baby, I was going to be disappointed about the C-section. I just couldn't stop smiling! The OB told me that she had never delivered a baby with thighs that big!

I was moved into recovery, where I requested that Skogen be brought down to me so that I could nurse and snuggle with him. However, the nurses in the recovery were very selfish and rude, telling the nursery that they were "way too backed up and busy to have a baby down there," but in all reality, they were standing around, chatting, and laughed when the nurse on the phone told the nursery that they baby couldn't come down. I took a quick glance around the recovery room and there were only two other patients down there with me and six nurses with nothing to do but watch us all regain feeling. I couldn't have been more disappointed. While there, the nurse massaged my uterus over and over and then turned me on my side, draining as much blood out as she could. It got to be pretty uncomfortable after a while when I started regaining feeling in my belly, but at this point, I just couldn't stop thinking about Skogen and that got me through the disappointment and the pain.

The anesthesiologist came to check on me in recovery and even though I couldn't wiggle my toes yet (the requirement before I could be moved up to my hospital room) he told the recovery nurse that they could move me up there anyway since they weren't going to let me bring the baby down there. After he left, my nurse said to another one, "He thinks she should go up, but she can't move her toes yet, so I'm not going to send her up." About 40 minutes later the anesthesiologist came back and noticed I was still there. He ordered for me to be brought up to the nursery immediately, obviously frustrated with the nurse who decided to overrule him. Finally, after another 20 minutes, I was wheeled up to my baby.

Erik greeted me in our hospital room, worried about why it was taking so long for me to get up to them. After he told me all about how he got to give Skogen a bath and how cute he was, he went and got Skogen out of the nursery. Our nurse that first night, Darla, was so amazing. She helped me move around into the right position to feed Skogen for the first time and was very patient with me when I couldn't quite get in the right position. I was still numb from under my boobs, all the way down to my feet, so it was difficult to move by myself! When Skogen woke up enough and got hungry enough, he latched right on and has fed well ever since. Not being able to breast feed was one of my biggest fears with having a C-section. I was so thankful that it worked out alright. The first few hours with Skogen and Erik alone was magical. We had never experienced this with Maida since she was in the special care nursery the first few days after delivery. I enjoyed every minute of our newborn son and couldn't wait for Maida to arrive to meet him. Her and my parents came up that night before bed. She was a very proud big sister.

Our hospital stay was enjoyable and exhausting both, and I have to admit that I missed Maida whole lot and wish that she could have been with us more. We got home on that Saturday afternoon and ever since it seems as though life has been a blur. Days and nights blend into each other, and if it wasn't for the ladies of the church bringing us dinners and my mom doing all the cleaning, cooking, and managing the household for the first week, I don't think I'd be able to make it. As I expected, recovering from a repeat C-section is a lot more difficult than the recovery the first time around, especially having an almost-two-year-old to keep up with!

As I get to know our new baby more and more, I am very thankful to have him here with us and have a healthy baby on top of that. I often wondered if I would regret my decision to have a repeat C-section, but given the circumstances, I know that I made the right decision. I still long to have that vaginal delivery that I've always dreamed of and I am extremely jealous of those who get that experience. I can't help but feel that I'm missing out on a very special part of life. I hope and pray that when we are ready to have another baby, I will be lucky enough to experience a vaginal delivery. Until then, I plan to enjoy my babes and be thankful for the option that I had to have C-sections, giving me two healthy babies because of it.